DoberPhant?
Camberman?
or my fav a Eleberman?

http://www.lairweb.org.nz/tiger/conflict.html

It’s possibly the second greatest site of all time. Unfortunately they don’t do invented animal conflicts (yet).

Imagine…a piss-pion hiding in the shadows behind your toilet, waiting for you to whip it out…one deft leap and ZOOOOOOOOOOM…a venemous Santa eating it’s way down your chimney while stinging you with a venomous tail out of sheer spite. Only potential upside…”gotta suck out the poison” trick would be a hit in bars across America for about a week.

I’ll address the Dobercon first. I don’t think a falcon’s wings could feasibly support anything but a toy doberman. The largest falcon, known as the Gyrfalcon, has a wingspan of just over 4 feet, but weighs less than five pounds. For a doberman to be truly scary, I’m thinking it would have to weigh a minimum of 25 pounds. That’s minimum. No way a falcon’s wings could support that.

If a good sized doberman had a pair of falcon wings sprouting from its back, sure, it would look cool, but there’s no way it could get off the ground. It probably would have a falcon’s heightened vision, but that’s about all it would get. So it would still just be a doberman, albeit with excellent eyesight.

Back to the sharkopotamus. I think the sharkopotamus, aside from the batsnake, is the best example so far. Hippos are pretty terrifying if they are mad at you, but, according to numerous sources, hippos pretty much like to keep to themselves. They only attack if their territory is threatend. Also, they’re not even carnivores. They sit around all day eating vegetation. And yes, Ben, they can run 18 miles an hour, but only for a few hundred yards. It’s not like they’ll be zooming all over the place. Furthermore, hippos are extremely susceptible to sunburn, which is why they like to stay submerged in murky water. So if you can get a hippo out of the water for more than an hour or so, it will bake in the sun like a lobster. Now who’s shaking in their shoes?

So yes, the sharkopotamus would no doubt be a formidable foe in the water. But sharks already are. Now, a Lionshark is something to be afraid of. Or perhaps a Sharkbear. But now we’re just getting ridiculous.

Also, if this is a ’serious’ discussion about animal hybrids, I think it’s important to say that there is no way that the wings on the albatross could ever support the weight of a an even mildly scary croc. The wings on a falcon couldn’t support anything but a baby doberman, and the wings on a bat would have a pretty tough time with any snake larger than 2 or 3 feet. Ooooo, I’m shaking in my shorts.

Sharkapotomus could find all the food it needs preying on Steve Irwin and those that are foolish enough to think that things like bullila and crocatross are feasible.

Terry, no more worrying your roomies. I think we need to hear your suggestion. I know there’s a great animal combo brewing in that head of yours…

As far as the sharkopotamus is concerned, I agree with “Lionbeartude” when he says it is too heavy to support its own weight. An animal that heavy couldn’t possibly run very fast. Its only option would be to catch animals in the ocean, assuming it can swim like a shark. And if that’s all it can do, then it’s pretty much just a shark with a big hippo face. Not all that terrible.

And Ben, when you say that you wouldn’t fear batsnakes because of their relatively small size and the availability of anti-venom potions, you’re forgetting one thing: batsnakes would not attack one at a time. They come at you in swarms. Ever see a movie where someone walks into a cave and then suddenly hundreds of bats swarm them? Imagine if those bats had snake teeth. I dare you to come up with a scenario scarier than being enveloped by hundreds of batsnakes. Batsnakes biting you, wrapping themselves around your neck, smacking you in the face with their tails, wriggling into your clothing. You wouldn’t have time to swat them with a tennis racket or reach for your precious anti-venom. The last thing you would do before you died is shit your pants in sheer terror.

Also, I’ve never seen Steve Irwin handle a snake or a bat. And even if he could handle one or the other, who’s to say he could successfully do battle with a batsnake? I say he would be torn to shreds by batsnakes as soon as he looked at them. Furthermore, mosquitoes and spiders are insects. This is a serious discussion about animal hybrids. If you want to discuss insect hybrids, why don’t you go to some freaking dork lab where entomologists hang out and talk about fruit flies.

“Lionbeartude,” if that is your real name, I’ll get to you tomorrow when I’ve had a chance to fully digest this dobercon. It intrigues me.

The notion of a bullilla, on the other hand, is borderline retarded.

Sure Batsnakes would be scary but easily avoidable. I should be relatively safe as long as I stay out of places where bats and snakes are usually seen, such as caves, jungles, tattoo parlors, campsites, etc. Same goes for the crocatross, as long as I stay in Western hemisphere and away from doomed ships I am golden.
I’m not even going to comment on the Sharkopatumus , because we all know it would not be fast enough catch enough prey to support it’s massive size. It would be extinct within a year. As far as made up animal hybrids go, strictly amateur hour. C’mon.

On top of the obvious flying and mauling capabilities, the dobercon would have all the heightened senses of the dog and the hawk. It would have super sight, super hearing, super scent, and I suspect super taste. That’s right I said super.

However, what makes the dobercon the most scary is it’s domestication. Sure bats and snakes are creepy but when encountered they usually just want to go their own way. Given that I live in civilization, what I am more scared of the crazy ass hillbilly who keeps and trains german winged canine killing machines. If this asshole thinks you wronged him, all he has to do is steal your scarf or favorite baseball cap which undoubtedly reeks of Tag body spray. Once he gives them your scent, his pack of dobercons would use their super senses and falcon tracking abilities to find and kill you on command.

You don’t even want to add rabies into this mix.

I also like the Bullilla, which is basically a Bull with gorilla hands instead of hooves, plus it’s always real pissed.