Bachelor Party!
Whoo!! My good friend Paul’s bachelor party is this weekend and I’m pretty psyched. Man, it’s going to be so awesome. We’re going to make him wear on of those novelty veils and we’re all going to wear hats with penises on them. And we’re going to make Paul wear Hawaiian leis, and then when we see a cute guy, we’ll make Paul put the lei around the guy’s neck and say, “You’ve just been lei’d.” Ha! That will be so sweet. Bachelors rule!!!!
Wait, no, that’s how bachelorette parties work. Never mind. It won’t be like that. Except I might be wearing a hat with a novelty penis on it, but I do that anyway. Don’t you tell me how to dress on the weekends! That’s my time.
I think we’re just going to be drinking all weekend. Except we will have an excuse to do so. And I know that some of the guys are going to play paintball on Saturday. Not me, though, because I have to work. But even if I didn’t have to work, I seriously doubt I would want to play paintball. From what I’ve heard, getting hit with a paintball hurts really bad. That does not sound like fun.
Anyway, I’m more of a laser tag man myself. Holy shit, if anyone ever wants to play laser tag, be it for a birthday party or just on a weekend afternoon, you better call me because I am sweet at it. I’m the kind of guy who uses code language and hand signals when I’m laser tagging. And I do a lot of unnecessary somersaults around the laser tag course. So, yeah, I’m pretty awesome. But you already knew that.
