Spring Fashion Preview!
It’s about 70 degrees in New York right now, but before I go outside and play basketball, I thought I would let you in on this Spring’s hot new looks! Why? Because I’m super fucking generous and nice, that’s why. So strap on your Easter bonnets and get ready for Jack’s Patented Spring Picks! First up, it’s…
1. Horsies!
Don’t even think of heading to a garden party without this season’s hottest accessory in tow! What’s that, you can’t afford a horse? Then rent one. You don’t know where to rent a horse? Then get out of my face.
2. Novelty Dolphin Hats
Everyday is a day at the beach when you slap one of these foam dolphin hats on top of your head. Don’t leave home without it!
3. Acting Like a Zombie
Okay, this isn’t so much a fashion statement as it is an overall attitude. So get out there and work it!
That will do it for the fashion roundup.
You might be thinking to yourself, “That wasn’t a fashion roundup at all. It seems like Jack just did a Google Image Search for Horse Jeans, Hats, and Halloween Costume and then wrote some bullshit around it.”
If you thought that, you would be wrong. Now, I’m going to go out and enjoy the day. I suggest you do the same. Oh, and the lineup and details for the variety show I’m hosting have been posted! Check it out!
