Part VIII, In Which Jack Kukoda Attempts To Give A Nickname To Every Player On The Buffalo Bills
Brian Moorman, Punter #8
AKA “The Cobra”
I’ll freely admit that this nickname makes no sense. I have no reason for giving Moorman the nickname “The Cobra” other than the fact that punters never have nicknames. There have probably been one or two in history, but I can’t think of any off hand. Anyway, I think Moorman should have one, if only because he was the only player on the Bills to be elected to the Pro Bowl.
Just imagine how cool it would be to hear an announcer say, “And the Bills fail to convert on the third down, so they’ll be forced to punt. Here comes…”The Cobra!” Moorman and the rest of the punt team could maybe even have some cool theme music like relief pitchers get when they come in from the bullpen. Something from Whitesnake perhaps? Anyone know any songs about cobras? That’s not important right now. They’ve got a whole off-season to come up with something.
So, “The Cobra.” I’ll give myself a solid B for this one. Takeo’s nickname is still my finest moment as far as I’m concerned, and I won’t rest until everyone calls him “Volcano.”
Oh, and there will be a video up by lunchtime.
