Jack Kukoda

Show me

your goats.

I’ve Got A Feeling…

Filed under: Sports! — By Jack at 1:25 pm on Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Thurman Thomas is going to the Hall of Fame!

Former Buffalo Bills RB Thurman Thomas was named a finalist for the Hall of Fame today in his first year of eligibility. So was Troy Aikman, who everyone knows is actually a gay voodoo priest, and Reggie White, who, sadly is dead.

By the way, during the Bills’ glory years of the late 80’s and early 90’s, Thurman’s nickname was “The Thurmanator.” I still have no idea what that means. I guess it was a play on “The Terminator,” but still, Thurmanator makes no sense. Germinator and Sperminator are also plays on Terminator, but those words have meaning. A germimator is someone or something that plants seeds and Sperminator is the title of a porno film that a friend of mine in high school stole from his dad. Whatever.


What’s with the flames? What does that signify?

So congratulations to you, Thurman Thomas. If you ever want to party, just give me a call. We can hang out in my apartment and watch NFL Video Yearbook tapes of the Bills while drinking Schlitz. I’ll wear my skintight AFC East Champions t-shirt that I’ve had since I was 8 years old. Call me. I promise it won’t be weird.

The H Is O, But My P is S*

Filed under: Blatant Lies — By Jack at 9:06 am on Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Part V, In Which Jack Kukoda Attempts To Give A Nickname To Every Player On The Buffalo Bills.

Filed under: Sports! — By Jack at 12:59 pm on Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The Heat Is On! Nope, Not Anymore

Filed under: Miscellaneous — By Jack at 9:23 am on Tuesday, January 10, 2006

What’s Crueler Than Cockfighting? Glad You Asked

Filed under: Lists — By Jack at 1:18 pm on Monday, January 9, 2006

The Everday Playlist

Filed under: Lists — By Jack at 9:34 am on Monday, January 9, 2006

It’s A Balmy 55 Degrees Here

Filed under: Miscellaneous — By Jack at 2:11 pm on Sunday, January 8, 2006

Tom Floaver, Laziest Cop On The Beat

Filed under: Miscellaneous, Samples — By Jack at 3:51 pm on Saturday, January 7, 2006

Friday Roundup

Filed under: Miscellaneous — By Jack at 5:24 pm on Friday, January 6, 2006

No, Seriously, My Apartment Is Freezing

Filed under: Miscellaneous, Lists — By Jack at 1:09 pm on Friday, January 6, 2006

So It’s Come To This: A Guest Post About Chad Johnson

Filed under: Sports! — By Jack at 8:54 am on Friday, January 6, 2006

News That I Use

Filed under: News — By Jack at 3:16 pm on Thursday, January 5, 2006

Dan Fouts Is A Racist

Filed under: Sports!, News — By Jack at 10:43 am on Thursday, January 5, 2006

It’s Official

Filed under: Miscellaneous — By Jack at 9:36 am on Thursday, January 5, 2006

I’m Out Of Here

Filed under: Miscellaneous — By Jack at 3:27 pm on Wednesday, January 4, 2006
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