Part II, In Which Jack Kukoda Attempts To Give A Nickname To Every Player On The Buffalo Bills
The Starting Defensive Line
AKA “Affirmative Action”
Clockwise from top left: Chris Kelsay, Justin Bannan, Tim Anderson, Aaron Schobel*.
What other reason could there be for starting four slow, unathletic, whiteD-linemen unless there’s some sort of entitlement program designed to level the proverbial playing field? I thought the NFL’s Diversity Program only applied to coaches, but apparently it extends to defensive ends and tackles, too. By the way, this was the unit that was on the field in the Bills’ latest embarrassment, this time to the Broncos. Oh, Bills! Why do I love you so when all you do is break my heart?!
*In fairness, Aaron Schobel is actually pretty good. This is the second straight season that he’s recorded ten or more sacks, becoming only the second player in Bills history to do so. Who was the first? You’re goddamn right it was Bruce Smith.
